Just As I Thought...

Yesterday morning, when I'm about to leave the house, I saw the dark clouds which means its gonna rain. I've got a feeling telling me something is gonna happen today. And so I went back upstairs and took my camera with me to school... and you know what... my hair kena cut because according to the school rules, my hair was considered long......... (well i dun have a pic of myself but got Mior's and Wei Xin's one. Then today, well I had quite alot of fun--> PJK, learning how to sing( my voice sucks) and even in tuition which was 6-7.30 was much better compare to the past few weeks. Then at 10+ my mum bought back burger king... ( too hungry until I forgot to take a picture of it) I though today was one of the happy days where nothing could ruin it. Well I was totally wrong. My friend called me at 10.2 or so and asked me about something.... and apparently according to her, I raised my voice and answer rudely to her... ( well I admit that I did raise my voice a little cause she keep asking though I've answer her). Then she said that she never want to speak to me ever again.... again ( this is the third time) This time she was even more serious than last time.... she was in tears when she said that she will never call me ever again and she will never see me again plus she will delete my contact and everything else.... This left me totally speechless.
So Once again, my heart was shattered into even smaller peices as it was still in the healing process. (me sad...)

Few Things In My Head

These are the few things that have been going on in my head since form 3(mid-term):
1.) What i'm doing... is it right or wrong?
2.) Why do I say or do those things?
3.) Should I even say those things to you?
4.) Do people hate me or what?
5.) Why do I annoy people whom I consider close to me? am I that lonely until I do those things?
6.) There is no point in telling you, you'll never understand. or will you?
7.)Do you even consider me as your friend, if so, tell me why you did those things to me.
8.) I know some things which i'm better off not knowing about them. They just make me feel left out.
9.) Though I don't say a thing, doesn't mean I don't know whats happening. Its better to keep quiet sometimes. Its better than causing a scene or a problem.
10.) Should I study? for what?
11.) Should I trust you or not... nah, better be safe and not get hurt.
12.) Lastly, why you out of everyone?

L4D 2....

According to Melvin, L4D 2 will be release in Malaysia on November....



o.o... Melvin can't wait to play it... sadly its during our SPM.. so we gotta wait until after SPM.

Melvin... this is for u. It has your long lost brother and sister, cousin and many more.. lol...

Tomorrow Just Another Day...

... Today I went Kar Loke's house alone... it wasn't that bad, but suppose to have more people according to Kar Loke. When he invited me to his house, he said 'the gang is coming' and I said to myself 'I got any gang meh??' and so at his house we played naruto for 2 hours... then he taught me how to play monster hunter...

Then this coming Sunday, Jian-Yong plans to go to 1 U... I comfirm going already, but still haven't comfirm who else is going.

The day after that, i''ll be joining Priscilla and the others to play basketball at the community hall at BU. Then I hope the idea of going to play L4D after that is stil on.

Back to now... I wonder why I've met you after such a long time and at a place where I would never expect us to meet... Though it made me very happy at that time, but now I've regretted going to that camp. You have once brought joy into my life when we were still in primary school, but that ended when we enter secondary school. The past 4 years I never forget you and the joy u've brought me but now its just another memory for me. Cause you never want to speak to me ever again.
And so I wish you all the best in your SPM and hope u lead a happy life as I will try my best to do so without you keeping me company.
I will look forward to tomorrow not with any expectation of you to forgive me,nor with any hope or joy, but to continue living my life in pain and sorrow. Though I've never shown it to anyone, but it doesn't mean it isn't there. I'm still a human being after all.

And so I thank you with the bottom of my shattered heart for bringing me joy before, but now I wish we never met during the camp. Cause the pain is unbearable.